Jun 05
My Apostrophe Posted by Leah

Hot Man Dieters (Is it okay if I call you HMD’ers?  Thanks!),

 Today has been rough.  Really rough. 

I know I said before that I would check in during the week if “inspiration” hit me.  It turns out, I am actually doing the opposite.  Kind of.  See…umm, how do I put this politely…I’m in the midst of some turbulent times, hormonally, and it is wreaking havoc on my body.  I’m coming upon my apostrophe, as my hilarious friend Ann so wonderfully calls it, and I feel as if I am under seige from forces beyond my control.  No, I am NOT overstating things!  To my female HMD’ers - you know what I’m talking about, right?  I’m not the only one who randomly develops a strong and unyielding need for baked beans, right?  I’m not the only one who feels that she MUST have quiche or die, right?  I’m not the only one who wakes up at 2 in the morning and scarfs down two handfuls of pistachios and half a block of gorgonzola on Stoned Wheat Thins, RIGHT?  Well…I was probably the only one doing so last night…er, this morning…

 Sometimes I hate being a girl!

BUT…I recovered.  I can’t believe I did, but I did!  And yes, it was after yet another two handfuls of pistachios (damn tasty damn nut damn shell damnit!), but it happened.  Lunch was a salad.  Snack was fruit.  Exercise was walking.  Dinner was completely balanced, appropriate and eaten at a respectful hour.  No more pistachios.  No more pistachios, I say!

 And now, my reward…

 Many of ya’ll know that I have a certain fondness for white boys.  I love ‘em, love ‘em to pieces, don’t know why.  (Sorry Mom!)  So when I saw that there was a movie coming out that featured a love story betwixt a beautiful, professional black woman and a hottie Hot ridiculously HOT white man I didn’t walk to the closest multiplex - I ran!  I saw the movie twice in theaters and then purchased it as soon as I could.  The movie - Something New.  The hottie Hot ridiculously HOT Man - Simon Baker.  My reward - it’s sitting in my DVD player right now, calling my name softly on the wind…Leah…Leeeeaaaahhh…….

Hot Man Simon Baker

I could crawl up in that smile and die…hormones - 0, Hot Man - 1…

 For more hilarious euphemisms for Aunt Flo, visit the brilliant folks at The Onion.

2 Responses

  1. sasefina Says:

    Dude, Simon Baker is the truth. And that movie is AWESOME. OK, adding it to the netflix queue…I need to rewatch it as well.

  2. Miss Gee Says:

    i thought it was ok to eat pistachios. thought it was a safe nut to nosh especially because the shell slows you down meaning you can’t exactly eat them by the trapful. terrif.

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